(Editor's note: Klaudia Zhelezny shines with the vibrant love of Messiah Yeshua. She was born in Kiev in 1948, near the deep ravine Babi Yar. At Babi Yar, during a two-day period in September of 1941, Klaudia's four grandparents and other family members had been among 33,000 Jews rounded up and killed by the Nazis in their first mass extermination. Yet as Betsie ten Boom observed, there is no pit so deep that God is not deeper still.)

Divided Heart

I was an atheist for most of my life. I thought about God at times when I was young, mainly because of the persecution that I experienced every day. Then I wondered, "For what reason am I a Jew?"

My first home was an apartment that my family was required by the government to keep. It was owned by a Ukrainian family that had supported the Nazis and hated Jews. Several times the son tried to break into our home at night with an axe shouting, "Dirty Jews, I'm going to kill you!"

When I was five my family moved to another home. It was in the former concentration camp at Babi Yar (others besides Jews had been held there awaiting death). My family renovated the public bath house that had been used by German officials and we lived there for 14 years. Often I went down into the Babi Yar ravine to play. I would find bones and bring them home. My mother told me to stop bringing things home but she never told me what had happened there. Only much later did I learn the truth.

As a child I sometimes visited the synagogue with my mother. But my father ridiculed God. He really believed in communism and Stalin at that time.

My heart was divided into many compartments: one for family, one for work, one for socializing, one for dealing with the government, and so on. But God had no place in my divided heart.

In 1988 my son was required to join the Soviet army. He tried to avoid this but the KGB arrested him and put him into a mental facility. The choices were mental treatment or prison or the army. We were trapped. Then I was called to meet with the KGB Major, a woman, who was handling his case.

Divine Hearing

At 11:00, the night before the KGB appointment, I was walking home. It was cold, dark and snowing so hard that I could not see. I fell down and wanted to die because life seemed so hopeless. Then I cried loudly, "God, if You are real, do something! Just do something!" Immediately, I knew Someone was around me. It was such a strong feeling. I could no longer cry, but I felt joy and even music in my heart. I thought I must be going crazy.

God's love is so deep and so filled with grace. That night, when He chose to reveal Himself to me, I was literally in the middle of a bridge crossing over the ravine Babi Yar.

At home I kept asking, "Lord, You speak instead of me." The next day the KGB Major began rudely. I said nothing, but prayed. Suddenly she said, " I don't know why, but I feel sorry for you." Sorrow? KGB? She told me she could close my son's case for two months but then she would have to act. Within minutes my son was free and we were out on the street together, amazed. Then I sent him and my daughter away to hide for six months until we left the Soviet Union.

I could not turn so quickly from my atheism. Yet as a Jew, very opposed to Christianity, I decided to seek God in the synagogue. I found interesting rituals but not the real God who had spoken to me that night.

During our emigration our family went to a refugee camp in Italy. I kept looking for God in a synagogue there. But one night some women threw me out, with everyone watching, after I lit the Shabbat candles improperly!

Again, I was hopeless and crying, alone in the dark. I had searched for Him for almost a year and my

hands were empty. Then God came to me again, saying, "Did I speak to you the first time in a synagogue?" I was so joyful to realize that He would find me!

A week later my son returned from a place called the American Club and said, "Mom! It's just what you are looking for!" This was the mission of a pastor and his wife who loved Jews and gave us solid teaching and free Bibles. Despite my opposing Yeshua, we all loved to visit the American Club.

Dynamic Harvest

One day, in our room at the refugee camp, I found a pamphlet with the phrase: "Yeshua – Messiah Of Israel." I was shocked! I had heard about both, but had never put the two together.

I had to know the truth. I decided to read only the Old Testament. If I would find Yeshua there, nothing would stop me. Soon, I discovered that only Yeshua could be the Messiah!

Then the American Club showed the Jesus film. Later, all four in our family realized that each of us had prayed to trust Yeshua during showings of this film!

In a few weeks we immigrated to Brooklyn. God burdened us to share Yeshua with other Russian Jews flooding in. We have done so ever since!

The Lord took my husband to His heavenly kingdom in 1996 but soon afterward our son became pastor of our new congregation, Hope Of Israel. Our daughter also serves the Lord.

I love Yeshua. He makes my heart whole and gives me His shalom. He enables me to share Him full-time with many Russian Jews and others. I know how deep is His love for me, and I want others to know Him, too.

"Redeem Israel, O God, from all their troubles!" (Psalm 25:22)